Me and my jackass subconscious

My battle with sobriety came to an end last night. There was much rejoicing. My inner dialogue is amusing and infuriating to me, though. Here's what happened:

I called Sara after work yesterday, and we arranged to meet at home and hang out a little. I'd hung out with her a bit before, and she was always very nice, if a bit quiet. So, she showed up, we chatted for a bit, then watched some TV. No big deal, right?

After a bit of TV, a sort of alarm went off in my head. I got the very distinct feeling that this particular moment was the opportune time for her to leave, and I knew that if I were her, I'd be getting up and taking off now.

As these thoughts are tumbling through my head, Sara gets up, thanks me for having her over, and vary graciously informs me that she must be on her way.

The following exchange occurs in my head:
Cool Me: "Well, that went well."
Jackass Me: "She's leaving."
Cool Me: "Yeah, but this is when I'd be leaving, too. Besides, I had an enjoyable time, and she seemed to, too. You're blowing whatever may be negative way out of proportion."
Jackass Me: "That's what I do."
Cool Me: "Tomorrow, I will recall this night as a successful venture in entertaining on my own, despite what you say."
Jackass Me: "That's what you think."
Cool Me: "You're going to beat yourself up all night, aren't you."
Jackass Me: "Yep."
Cool Me: "I hate you."

Guess what I spent the rest of the evening doing.

Looking back more objectively, though, I think it went well, especially considering my natural aversion to strangers and social situations.

I just need to stop taking that negative perspective so seriously. I hate that fucker.

- Negativity, Get Lost